Certificate: 18
Running Time: 102 mins
Director: Tom Six
Starring: Dieter Laser, Laurence Harvey, Bree Olson
Genre: Horror
Country: Holland, USA
You ever wonder what would happen
if Burt “The Bandit” Reynolds snorted his fucking sanity out through his
asshole, went shit crazy, and ran a prison straight out of an Exploitation
movie? The result is simple… The Human Centipede 3 [Final Sequence].
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| Larry's "Fat Hitler" costume lost out to "Chemo" Marlboro Man in the Prison Pageant |
We’ve made no secret about our
love of centipedes here at KiV. The Human Centipede [First Sequence] was
the first film we screened at our Movie Bar back in September 2010, and though
the second movie lacked some of the “grace” of its predecessor it still
created enough of a rounded realm to hold one’s attention and even raise a few bigger issue questions. The third film is neither of these flicks.
Imagine a cartoon-like land in
which cause, effect, rhyme and reason have no relation to one-another. One in which there is no light and shade,
redeeming qualities, or even depth.
Somehow the movie runs for 102 minutes… most of this is (the previously
brilliant) Dieter Laser yelling…
always fucking yelling! It’s sad what it’s
become. The first film had something
truly unnerving. Where Grotesque was torture porn, THC 3 is so laughably over the top it’s
little more than panto porn.
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| Let's all do the conga, let's all do the conga. La-la, la, la! |
Dull… dull… dull and nowhere near as clever as it thinks it
is. I'm not even going to bother reviewing the performances they're all so one-dimensional that they simply are incapable of standing up to any degree of interrogation. If I had to pick between watching this again and fucking all of my dead relatives I'd ask for a shovel.
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