FILM: The League of Bats (Ranking the Caped Crusader) - #8

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is the first iteration to show us a different side of Alfred Pennyworth.  Whether it's Alan Napier (Batman, 1966-68), Michael Gough (Batman - Batman & Robin, 1989-1997) or Michael Caine (Batman Begins - The Dark Knight Rises, 2005-2012) though the tone has changed there has been one constant.  The faithful servant of Wayne Manor has always been the bow tie & tails rendering.
"Just remember to delete your internet history when you've finished with the
Bat-Computer, Robin."
It should come as very little surprise that the new DC Extended Universe (under the watchful eye of Geoff Johns) should borrow from his excellent Batman: Earth One graphic novel.  Jeremy Irons' Alfred is a tough-talking, whisky swilling, grease-monkey who doesn't stand on ceremony. Where necessary he delivers some home-truths and even *spoilers* pilots the goddamn Batwing!!  He's a fantastic piece of casting, an exceptional piece of writing from Goyer and Terrio; one of the high points of the movie.

8. Batman Returns (1992)
Michael Keaton || Batman

Before you start screaming heretic!  Stop, and think it through.  Though enjoyable in parts, Batman Returns is a Batman movie in name alone.  Batman does little-to-no detecting, he's also exclusively reactive rather than proactive and has an non-existent relationship with Commissioner Gordon.  Add to that Catwoman is created by getting licked by some "magic cats", Penguin is one police report from being a rapist and the entire storyline is straight out of the TV show.  Wait... there's more because Batman Returns has in it the mile-marker that opened the door to Batman & Robin.  
*Throws Bat-Shade*
I get that you might want to take control of the Batmobile.  I can even overlook the fact that a group of carnies can get the blueprints for a one-of-a-kind vehicle and that their tent building skills gives them enough knowledge to deconstruct and put back together the Dark Knight's ride... but why the fuck does Penguin need a kids ride from a supermarket to operate it from?  I call guano on that.

Heroes of Hollywood Boulevard is available on Amazon in paperback and on Amazon Kindle in the mass market "Stars & Bars" cover and an Amazon Exclusive "blank variant".

Stu Hogan is idolized by every child walking Hollywood Boulevard apart from his own.  Working the star-studded street as a Batman impersonator alongside good pal Brian (Superman) and steroid shooting Ricky (The Incredible Hulk), Stu's love of alcohol, gambling and strippers have left him behind with his alimony, down on his luck and looking for a quick fix for both.

Seeing an opportunity to change his circumstances, Stu enlists his fellow superheroes for a daring heist that has the impersonators fall short of their counterparts' lofty standards causing friendships to fracture and divisions to become deadly.

Click [here] for the FREE zero chapter.


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